How willing, how COMFORTABLE are you with saying No to people?
Can you do this without feeling wrong, guilty, like you are a bad person?
If not, ask yourself why not?
I’m not suggesting that you shouldn’t care about others, that you shouldn’t be kind and decent and do kind and decent things.
But don’t confuse that with saying yes by default, as an instinctive reflex response, irrespective of what’s being asked of you.
Learning to say No with integrity, kindness and respect is one the most liberating things there is.
You do not need to say yes to things you hate, just because someone asked you.
Th key though is just just reading these words, but actually doing this. By calmly, kindly but firmly saying No to things you don’t want, don’t serve you and don’t feel right to you.
Nothing good comes from you going against your values and instincts in order to please another. It simply means that the person you are letting down is you rather than someone else.
That is the greatest betrayal of all.
By saying yes to things you don’t want, you leave less room for the things that you DO want, do value, do help you become who you want to be and to create the life you want to live.
So today, if you want to (and if you don’t want to, you’ve found something very important to consider), decide to respect your own choices, your own decisions, and say No to things you don’t want.
Then you can start living a life that make sense and works for you instead of simply for others.
- 📷 @fuckinmagazine
3,9624118 November, 2019
When you’re grateful, fear disappears and abundance appears ~ Tony Robbins
How much of your time do you spend dwelling on all the things that you think are wrong in your life, instead of all the things you have to be thankful for?
How much time, energy do you waste of feeling bad about things that you have allowed, that YOU HAVE CHOSEN to make you feel upset, angry and frustrated?
Most people spend most of their time, most of their LIVES, with their thoughts dominated by their problems. But they do this, they make this choice unconsciously.
Because if you understood the real costs of this choice it’s one you never consciously choose.
Here’s why this matters.
Our minds are perceptual machines. What that means is that our minds are filters, filtering in and out of our conscious awareness the things that are most relevant to us.
How is what’s most relevant defined? By your dominant thoughts.
So if your dominant thoughts are focussed on your problems, on all the things that are wrong in your life, your subconscious mind, the most powerful machine in the known universe, sets out to find more and more things that are wrong and to present them to you.
So your life fills up with ever more problems.
Whereas if your dominant thoughts are on all the things that you have to be grateful and thankful for, your subconscious mind takes THAT instruction and goes and finds ever more things to fill your life with that you will be careful for.
We communicate, we INSTRUCT our subconscious minds through our dominant thoughts and feelings.
Most people do this by accident.
I’ve just told you how to do it on purpose.
That’s why focussing on what you’re grateful for isn’t just some woo woo, new age hippy thing.
It’s how you get what you want, on purpose using your incredible subconscious mind to work for you instead of accidentally against you.
So maybe is a good day to start counting those blessings….
I‘ve been having a lot of talks with myself recently. I want to make sure that I’m pursuing my interests for healthy and emotionally sustainable reasons. Do you have goals? Do you know why you want to meet this goal? If you do, are these reasons external or internal? Is the path to achieving this goal going to help you grow into who you truly are, or will they help you grow into the person you think you should be? Is one better than the other? And what happens if you don’t meet those goals? Do you even know what you really want to get out of it if you make it or if you don’t? Prestige? A feeling of accomplishment? Bragging rights? Enlightenment? Wealth? Nothing at all? Or is it something else you can’t quite put your finger on yet? I don’t think there are any right or wrong answers necessarily. But I think a general idea of what I want and what I’m looking for, even if it’s vague or convoluted, is important for my personal growth. I just want to avoid any inadvertent and well intentioned self sabotage. What about you? What do you want? Why do you want what you want? ANYWAY here’s a quick painting I did based on a photo by the amazing photographer @samjsn ! #painting#painter#paint#oilpaint#oilpaints#oilpainting#landscape#seascape#oceanpainting#oceanart#wavepainting#personalgrowth#growth#goals#art#artist#aesthetic#aestheticart#instaart#instaartist#artistoninstagram#artistsofinstagram#emilymackey#emilymackeyart
7,681842 hours ago
I'm regularly described as gentle, which is interesting because I spent most of my life being anything but gentle towards myself. It's easy to give to others before ourselves, isn't it? Approaching myself with gentleness has been a practice I've only started developing over the last few years, and one that continues to unfold as I do.
A question I've been asking myself often lately:
"How can I be gentle with myself here?"
This simple question creates space. It creates room to choose. It creates a disruption of patterned response. It creates a reminder of my own capacity to show up for myself. It creates an honoring. A remembering. A belief in my ability to be with myself in a way that honors my goodness. It creates the opportunity to do something differently, one moment at a time. It creates empowerment. It creates a new emotional experience with myself, which literally changes my brain.
What is on your list of what self-gentleness looks like?
How do you know when you're being gentle with yourself?
How does your nervous system respond to gentleness?
What is your relationship with gentleness like?
What would it be like to approach yourself in this way?
Happy Monday, my friends. Be gentle with yourself. 💫
🇺🇸 Remember that perfect skin DOES NOT EXIST !! Love your skin, take care of it and care for it. 💜💜 ////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////// Recuerda que la piel perfecta NO EXISTE!! Ama a tu piel, cuídala y mímala. 💜💜 Mis TOP 7 ERRORES en el cuidado de la piel.
1. No exfoliarte o hacerlo en exceso.
2. Dormirte con maquillaje ☠️ 3. Uso inadecuado del protector solar.
4. Usar brochas sucias.
5. No tomar suficiente agua 💦
6. No limpiarte bien.
7. No leer las etiquetas. .
𝐌𝐈𝐍𝐃𝐅𝐔𝐋 𝟐𝟎𝟐𝟎 + 𝐕𝐄𝐑𝐆𝐎𝐄𝐃𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐙𝐎𝐑𝐆𝐕𝐄𝐑𝐙𝐄𝐊𝐄𝐑𝐀𝐀𝐑𝐒!
Begin het nieuwe jaar met aandacht voor jezelf 💆♂️🧘
👉 In januari 2020 start er een officiële 8 weekse mindfulness-based stress reductie (MBSR) training. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
8 bijeenkomsten van 2.5 uur
dagelijks 1 uur aandacht voor jezelf
🤷♂️ 𝐕𝐎𝐎𝐑 𝗪𝐈𝐄
Tijdens de training leer je om uit jouw automatische piloot (lees onbewuste patronen) te stappen, waarbij o.a. de volgende thema's de revue zullen passeren:
stress en burn-out
angst en somberheid
omgaan met prikkels/afleiding
Prachtige locatie in Amsterdam oost, van alle gemakken voorzien. Het enige wat jij dient mee te nemen ben jij zelf.
Voel je vooral welkom om eerder aan te schuiven of achteraf te blijven plakken voor een lekkernij + kop thee. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
Check of jouw huidige zorgverzekeraar een vergoeding verstrekt voor het volgen van een mindfulnesstraining. 𝘡𝘰 𝘯𝘪𝘦𝘵? Overweeg een tactische overstap voor komend jaar. Voor een overzicht van vergoedingen per zorgverzekeraar, zie deze link: https://www.zorgwijzer.nl/vergoeding/mindfulness ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
🔍 𝐌𝐄𝐄𝐑 𝐈𝐍𝐅𝐎𝐑𝐌𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐄
06 40 18 46 98
015 minutes ago
Just read that sentence in the book "The Mindful Athlete" and it hit me straight how powerful that message is! (But also how challenging it is to detach from feeling good🤔)
The bigger your BURNING DESIRE, the bigger your DREAM, the bigger your WHY -> the smaller the obstacles and challenges will be!
How can you detach yourself from feeling good?
-> one way is through practicing mindfulness and observing your mind in a nonjudgmental way -> because you are not your thoughts and you don't have to identify yourself with them...which is essential for detaching yourself from having to feel good!
What are your experiences with this?
216 minutes ago
Morning meetings get us energized and motivated for the day!🙌🏽💥
016 minutes ago
Boy is this ever something I struggle with: giving up a good thing to focus on a better thing.
I don’t know about you, but often when I recognize that I need to move on from something good, I internalize it more as a personal failure rather than what it is: the ending of one chapter before another begins.
I understand that, like a tree, we must prune good branches in order for better growth, so why then can it be so difficult to let go?
I wonder how much societal pressures play a roll. With messages like “more is more”, with the comparison trap, and with positive affirmation on productivity in the form of likes and follows, it’s no wonder that some (most?) of us may find our worth in doing.
MISSION NUTRITION 2.0 - heute mit Kids 👧🏽👶🏼⠀
Damit unsere Vision Realität werden kann, setzen wir uns täglich ein, den Menschen eine Lösung für ihre gesundheitlichen und/oder finanziellen Probleme zu bieten. 💚💚
😏“I reeaaaaally like him...but...” -He just got out of a relationship and isn’t over his ex😣
-He’s living on his parent’s couch right now and has a little alcohol problem🙅🏼♀️
-He told me “he just wants to have fun and isn’t looking for anything serious”🙄
-He lives in a different city/state/country😓
-He told me he doesn’t have time for anything serious🤨
-He only texts me at midnight on Fridays...😒
🤷🏼♀️GIRL. He is telling you he is unavailable and you’re wondering why it isn’t working?!
You can choose to ignore reality and invest in someone who is TELLING you they are unavailable OR you can hear what they are saying and SAVE YOUR ENERGY💫
Your precious, beautiful, valuable energy…
You only have so much of it
💔I used to invest time into people who were unavailable...CLASSIC insecure- avoidant attachment loop-that left me hopeless, worn out, and heart-broken again and again
Today my mission is to help as many women as possible get out of the cycle of failed relationship after failed relationship 🙏🏼 and help save them from the pain, heartbreak, confusion, and feelings of failure that dating can bring...
💞I am so passionate about this work because I know there is a path out of the vicious cycle-healing and knowledge-that can save you from years of heartbreak
Most unavailable person I’ve dated? Definitely someone who was married but left out that detail until our 3rd date or so...Meet me in the comments below and let’s talk unavailable people/worst first date stories-Go!👇🏼
12310 minutes ago
Restorative yoga 🧘🏻♀️ It’s not a practice that came easy me —to lay in stillness with my own thoughts??? 🤸🏻♂️
If you are like me, practicing stillness can be a chore. It’s much easier for me to move and workout than sit perfectly still in a meditative practice. To calm the mind is even more challenging for me. But that is exactly the goal of restorative yoga - to calm the body and mind and to be wholly present.
How can I let my body and mind unwind? How can I do less?" In restorative yoga, we let go of all muscular effort, trust the earth to hold us completely, then if we find we are still holding ourselves up somewhere, we let go again in the next breath. This creates deep release and ease in the body and teaches us how we keep working and doing even when it’s not necessary, so we go back into our regular activities in a more peaceful way. 💫
It also brings on the relaxation response that tells us we are safe, pulls us out of "flight or fight" mode, and initiates the body's self-healing process. We switch over from worrying about staying "safe" to feeding the longevity systems of digestion, elimination, reproduction, growth repair, and immunity.
It asks us to stop all the doing and face what we really need to look at about ourselves. A lot of people think relaxing is about letting go, but rather than throwing out, we are trying to make space for what’s uncomfortable and to allow more space for the full experience of who we are. 💫
In life there is a time to push and a time to grind, a time to ebb and a time to flow. Let Tomorrow evening be your time to flow and restore peace. Join us in this 75 min restorative and sound healing by @emodied.expressions class. DM to reserve your spot .
3010 minutes ago
If the sight of the blue skies fills you with joy, if a blade of grass springing up in the fields has power to move you, if the simple things of nature have a message that you understand, rejoice, for your soul is alive.
24310 minutes ago
We’re prepared to dominate our goals this week!👏🏼💥
1112 minutes ago
How your brain often tricks you and how to use it to your advantage. Our brains are amazing pattern recognition machines!
But sometimes we think we know information that we don't thanks to an autocomplete function in the mind.
Our brains take something it knows and applies it to what is in front of it.
Can't recall a lot of information when you read fast? Probably spent a lot of brain power filling in the gaps. Go slower. Allow the deliberate brain time to catch up.
Our first response to information is also very often emotional, the thrill of a movie, the joy of a happy ending. Feel those emotions, then revisit the same thing and notice that the emotion is dulled. This means it's time for your thinking, rationale mind to go to work.
All this means is that our brain has a normal way of operating. Often just knowing how it works can calm down our anxiety over learning.
Slow down. Or, if you go fast, go over it twice. The initial read is often just your brain filling in the gaps.
More about adding feedback loops in your learning in later posts.
If you are enjoying these, consider coming to the memory workshop this weekend (link in bio).
Remember the days when you starved yourself? When you binged and purged and tortured yourself? Where the disease of your mind was only met by the corrosion of your physical health, and you hadn’t had a period in over 6 years? Remember when you knelt before the porcelain gods after each heave, praying to whoever and whatever was out there, that something would come along to save you? So that maybe, just maybe, your body would do you the enormous favor of creating a life for you to hold and love and care for one day...?
...Not that i felt i was equipped for the job, though. I was selfish and dysfunctional and was barely able to care for myself, much less anyone else.
Remember the hopelessness? Remember the despair?
But i also remember the fight in you. And the determination.
I remember carrying on, despite how hard.
I remember the persistence, despite the pain.
And here we are....
Not only one little life for me to care for, but two. Two little lives to cherish. To learn from.
And it all started with choice to learn to love myself first.
In the end, no one ever came along to save me.
In this story, the damsel saved herself.
Whatever you all out there are going through right now, just remember as long as you’re still breathing there’s hope 💗
551114 minutes ago
But I'll take my time anywhere
I'm free to speak my mind anywhere
And I'll redefine anywhere
Anywhere I roam
Where I lay my head is home
Ive worked really hard for some my biggest mistakes✨
2114 minutes ago
Winter in Calgary is just a little different compared to BC last year! ❄️Looking forward to a white Christmas though!! 🏝️
What about you? Are you a Palm Trees for Christmas or a White Christmas kinda gal? 🎄
3114 minutes ago
👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽 in removing toxic people, remember that you are the average of 5 PEOPLE U SURROUND YOURSELF WITH! (I did a video of how to expand your social circle-link in the bio!) .
Since graduating college, I have had to work extra hard to expand my social circle with the types of people whose goals, visions, and dreams somewhat align with my own! .
Exciting News!! 🤩🤩🤩Starting February 2020 I will be hosting a podcast and interviewing new people each month. 👏🏽
Topics include anything from meditation, to yoga, shadow work, inner child work, awakenings, discipline/compassion, energy work, mindset, vulnerability, personal growth, higher concepts of self and soul, and all things spirituality! 💫
I’m starting scheduling now so if you’re interested in being on my podcast, send me a message and let’s get it in the books! 👍🏽
Let’s bring value, wisdom and deep conversations to the vast dimensions and realms of spirituality! 🙌🏽
I’m so excited for all of the goodness in store for 2020! 🥰
Let’s make it happen and bring light and love into the world! Love ❤️, Light ☀️, and Peace ✌🏽! Namaste 🌻
Hello 37 🙌! Another trip around the sun complete. Another year of personal growth and self love. Another year of living my dream. Another year of sharing my truth. .
Exactly 1 year ago today I confessed to my family that my life behind closed doors was anything but perfect. Sure, it looked great on social media and in the public eye but they truly knew I was sad. They knew I was hurting and that there were words spoken to me that nobody should ever hear. I was working myself to the max to mask my insecurities at home. My job became my security blanket. And then things literally fell apart. It wasn't a happy birthday. It was a wake up call. .
A year later I feel full of life again. Full of love and gratitude for the people closest to me that have been there in every moment of change and personal development. The ones who have hugged me tight and cheered me on. The ones who have picked me up when I have fallen. I'm grateful for my daughter who inspires me with her strength and love daily. She makes me brave and and encourages me to continue sharing my heart with others. I am grateful for a man who taught me believe in love again (even though I didn't want to.) A man that understands my story and makes me feel like the most special woman on the planet every single day. I am grateful for a career that fills my cup and keeps me fulfilled. I'm grateful that it is no longer my escape or safe place. .
Life has a funny way of knocking you down, only to put you in a better place. Thank you for following along on this journey with me and cheering me on from afar. I'm fully trusting that year 37 is going to be the best one yet. I am ready. .
8218 minutes ago
Keine Angst vor meiner Tiefe zu haben, oder vor dem zu was ich fähig bin, ist das mutigste, was ich machen kann.
Ich bin grenzenlos, das Einzige, was mich beschränkt bin ich selbst. Und diese Erkenntnis tut weh, weil uns immer beigebracht wurde, die Schuld im Außen zu suchen.
Weil der Fokus immer auf dem Außen lag um uns klein zu halten. JETZT ist die Zeit das zu ändern.
When your opponent closes the path to recovering to Lasso guard for the other direction and find yourself a #trianglechoke
Whether it be security and protection, weight loss, confidence, discipline or focus, we’ve got your back! Let us help you fight your battles. YOU are worth fighting for!
There isn't much in terms of a visible physical transformation between these two photos, but that's okay.
This journey is about GROWTH🌱 and every single moment is MAGIC💫
The version of me on the left was quiet, insecure, lacked confidence & based her worth on the opinions of others.
The version of me on the right is not so quiet, way more sure of herself, confident 95% of the time & loves herself daily.
It's been a long ten years, but I'm proud of the woman I am.
I've fought hard to become her💪🏻
Today's post is a snippet from tomorrow's blog article appropriately called: "To Improve The Quality Of Your Life, Focus On Getting Better." Everything taking place in your life now, whether unwanted or not, results from the accumulation of your thoughts and beliefs. This is empowering for many reasons least of which means you have the power to change your future by examining your thoughts. How you feel about this? Does it make you unhappy that your life’s conditions result from everything you’ve ever thought? Whilst I understand you might feel this way, you may also see the power to create new circumstances for your life from this point forward. Personal growth is a long and arduous journey with many setbacks and detours. Those who embark on this journey give up because of the difficulties they face....
3120 minutes ago
Saved the best for last. Season finale, next week. Or now for patrons of UD! (Link in bio) Art by @eli_jorgensen
4121 minutes ago
Build character by jumping out of your comfort zone 🧗🏼♂️
Tuesday tip from Leela- Drink yo water! ..... or sit in it?
Coming from someone who still has a ways to go in consuming enough water daily 😉
Finding that if I make a morning chug non negotiable before breakfast, I’m not ravenous first thing in the morning!
I took on the #speightswestcoaster 1/2 marathon with very little deep internal belief in myself. I’ve never liked running... both physically & mentally. It was always “too hard” making me feel uncomfortable in so many ways. I would pull out ever excuse under the sun ☀️ not to run!! Whatever it is physically, mental or both, take on a challenge that pushes the boundaries of your internal belief system.
I’ve taken on this challenge not because I want to be a avid runner, I’ve taken this on to work on my belief in myself across the board, to be able to face any challenge that pushes me out of my comfort zone.
2009 - Young, shine-eyed, fresh, future-gazing, voting Lib Dems, naive, budding musician, drinking, drinking a lot, working in Sainsburys, going abroad for the first time, just about to drop out, the protagonist in a film about himself, a lot to learn about viewing the world through another's eyes
Long day? No sweat. Catch up on some scintillating chapters from your favourite memoir. A big shout out of appreciation to @mthethwa_ntando for this lovely post. Happy reading! 📚
• • • • • •
I have not been reading much this year 🙈. My husband bought me this book, as I want to get back to reading.
________________________ I am trying to not blame it much on having a baby and adjusting to being a new mom, but I will use that excuse anyway 😂. _______________________________
YOU ARE THE CREATOR. How I created a life of abundance and you can too.
Have you ever felt so small? And just lost in your journey? Like that never ending tunnel and sometimes you see the light at the end and you’re almost there but you look down for two seconds only to look up and that little light is gone?
I been there.. so many times in my life. This weekend at the closing circle of my retreat, as the last woman was speaking and sharing her experience, the song I used to listen to on REPEAT to give me hope started playing.
I started bawling because as my friend Ali said, it was such a full circle moment. Two years ago I couldn’t see the light. I had “failed” at my self love journey and felt I possibly missed my calling or I wasn’t qualified.
In that moment, as “Serity” by Vallis Alps softly entered into the background I was shook. I was in my calling. I created this life changing even for 15 women.
We ALL experienced breakthroughs, downloads, experiences and bonds we NEVER thought were possible for us.
I held space as I often do but for once, I felt truly HELD. Everyone was thanking me but the gratitude goes to them.
I had an abundance of love, connection, wealth, experiences I could never replace.
I came home yesterday, sat with God and asked what’s next for me. I ended last night with the news that while simultaneously facilitating this transformational weekend - I also double ranked in my hair company in under three weeks.
All because I chose to keep pushing, I decided that nobody was going to stand in my way and my purpose is to serve.
I said YES to things people would say no to. I showed up even when I wasn’t ready and I kept chipping at the walls I built around the power within me.
Be brave. Follow your intuition not the voices of these haters, doubters and that inner critic.
Make your voice loud. Do the scary thing. Say yes to the experience, to the opportunity.
You are the creator, you get to CHOOSE your life today.
So tell me, what are you choosing, right now? Share in the comments below👇🏽👇🏽
35327 minutes ago
In the last few years, particularly since my Mum passed away, I feel like I have been through a massive period of personal growth. To say it has been a journey would be an understatement.
In October 2017 I pledged to eating purely vegetarian food for the month of November in order to raise money for Cancer Research. However, little did I know that I would never eat meat again and would actually take the next step to becoming vegan. When people say "I could never give up meat, I love it too much"... I was that person. Many years ago Lewis talked to me about the possibility of him going vegetarian and I told him I couldn't be with someone if they didn't eat meat 🤣 but I have never felt happier knowing that my actions now align with my morals 🌱
On top of this, I took a jump and did something my Mum never thought I could... In 2018 I went travelling with Lewis visiting 10 different countries. This was the best 5 months of my entire life and I've never felt freedom or choice quite like it. These months showed me that no matter what path in life we choose we all deserve to do what makes us happy and only spend our precious time doing things that serve us.
Wanting the ability to have more choice, when I returned from my travels I started my own Arbonne business alongside my full time job. I'm absolutely mad for the incredible products 😍 but even better than that, being a part of this incredible community has helped me grow as a person so much over the last year. Allowing myself to be open minded to personal development has helped me realise that the only person responsible for my life is me, that the energy and positivity we express helps determine our own outcomes and if we don't change anything then guess what? Nothing changes 🤷♀️ I know that I am on a journey and I'm going through a period of change in my life right now but I'm getting out of my comfort zone and that's where the magic happens 🌟 I know that my Mum has led me on the path that I now follow because all she ever wanted was for me to be happy.
I won't deny that I'm nervous but I'm excited for the future too 💕